Sports play a significant role in promoting physical and mental well-being. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Band 9 essay sample
According to some people, sports help to promote physical and emotional well being in people. I fully agree with this view. Playing a sport not only enables us to stay physically fit but also helps us release pent-up negative emotions.
Health benefits of physical activity are already well known. People who play a sport tend to be healthier than those who lead a highly inactive lifestyle. That is because our body is designed to move. If it stays inactive, it will begin to decay. Playing a sport helps us flex our muscles and boosts cardiac function. It improves blood circulation and prevents wear and tear to a great extent. What’s more, when we become physically active, our body releases certain feel good hormones. They boost our overall sense of happiness. Physical activity even improves our performance at work or school by enhancing our ability to concentrate.
Sports promote mental health as well. Playing reduces our anxiety. For many people, playing a physical sport is a means to give vent to all those bottled up negative emotions. Sports also improve our self esteem. It improves our cognitive skills as well. What’s more, sports teach us to accept both success and failure. It improves our team spirit too. Studies have shown that people who play a sport regularly are less likely to become depressed. They know how to handle the ups and downs of life and this knowledge helps them cope with the uncertainties of life.
To conclude, sports offer a variety of health benefits – both mental and physical. Playing a sport helps us to stay in good shape and good health and thus improves our self image and confidence. It promotes our emotional health as well by enabling us to conquer our negative emotions.
Analysis
Task response: 9/9
The writer fully agrees with the given argument and uses valid arguments to support their opinion. There is a proper introduction and conclusion. Body paragraphs have appropriate structure.
Coherence and cohesion: 9/9
The essay is divided into 4 paragraphs. The structure is appropriate. Each paragraph discusses one main idea. Transitions are used effectively and hence there is a smooth flow of ideas.
Grammatical range and accuracy: 9/9
There are hardly any grammar mistakes. A variety of sentence patterns are used correctly.
Lexical resources: 9/9
The range of vocabulary is adequate. While it is not particularly impressive, words are used in the right context.
